Weekly + weekend + February update

Good afternoon 😃

Happy hump day!

(I just hate this expression. It sounds like something naughty. It’s like Spanish. It’s a beautiful, sexy language, so when I hear someone speak Spanish I immediately think about adult activities. It’s me, right? I’m troubled. I know.)

Enough of my dirty, crazy mind.

I haven’t posted since Friday and I totally owe you an update on my weekend, my to-do list, this half week and February in general. Here we go. I’ll start by telling you what I was up to last weekend.

Saturday – 24.02

I went to bed pretty late on Friday. We had dinner with friends and it was really nice. We had a lot of fun as usual and spent a long time throwing boy name suggestions at my pregnant friend. They have a name picked out for a girl but no name for a boy so we had fun sharing and hating each other’s ideas. By the way, they have just announced publicly so I can disclose more. One of my besties Patrícia is 13 weeks pregnant. She’s the first one to get pregnant in our group of friends and we’re just so excited. We keep referring to the baby as she but they have no idea if it’s boy or girl, which is really funny. Here’s the little cutie:

We’ve been friends for a very long time and are very, very close so our kids will be calling us auntie. I’m so happy and excited. You know how much I love a pregnant lady and how obsessed I am with babies. Congratulations mama! I love you and I love your baby already. ❤️

Anyway, I’m talking about Saturday, not Friday. But I do have a point. Because of dinner I went to bed late which means I took my pills pretty late and that plus being very tired resulted in me waking up at almost 3 p.m the next day. Oh yeah. We wanted to go out but I wasn’t feeling well (side effects from no longer taking some of my medication, which I don’t mind at all) so we decided we would only go out to buy dinner. We went to Aldi but there was nothing we wanted and it was almost closing so the security guard was giving us dirty looks. Feeling pressured, we decided to try a different store. I was about to pass out because of said side effects and hunger so I just picked my usual carbonara pizza. Rui picked something else. We tried a new drink and a new dessert (a new weekend challenge) and we weren’t impressed by either. Remember, when I say “drink” I mean “non-alcoholic beverage”. I don’t drink AND I take medication. We wanted to watch a movie but I was too sleepy, so we just went to bed.

Sunday: 25.02

We woke up earlier on Sunday and decided we definitely had to go out and get a few things. Rui needed new running gear (my man runs 12 km, 3 times a week, I’m so proud of him!), I needed some new underwear and socks and we definitely needed some groceries. My mom happened to call while we were having a very late breakfast. We bugged her so much to come with us that she eventually accepted her defeat and said she would come, after endlessly complains about “why am I going shopping with you? It’s boring enough to do my own grocery shopping.” I think it might have been the promise of ice cream. We picked her up an hour later and off we went. We do have lots of fun together, the three of us. I was too lazy to wash my hair so I wore a hat.

It was not cold at all and my mother said I looked very silly with mah beanie. She said I had tricked her because I mentioned I was going to take a shower when I hung up the phone earlier. I told her I hadn’t lied at all. I did, in fact, take a shower. I never said anything about washing my hair.

First, we went to this huge sports store where Rui got new running shoes, socks, shorts and a t-shirt. I got a new swimsuit and mom got bored. We stopped by H&M to see if they had the panties I like but they didn’t so I had to buy this jeans:

I mean, they’re pink and 9,99€. I had to have them. Does anyone like colored jeans? Not even this really nice pastel pink? Okay. Well, they do match about 50% of my closet, so.

Mom was way too bored at this point so we finally took her to McDonald’s. We chatted for a while and then we took poor Isabel home. My favorite grocery store is near my moms house and so I convinced Rui we HAD to shop there instead of going to a supermarket close to home. I found a few nice, cheap packs of panties (yes, I do buy my everyday panties in boring packs) and got about 10 pairs for 10€. I got a few pairs of socks too. We got 2 cute mugs but I forgot to take a picture of Rui’s. This is mine:

It says free but I totally had to pay for it. I promised I didn’t tell that stupid joke to the cashier. But only because I forgot. We got many things for a cheap price. That’s why I love this store so much – great variety and awesome prices. I thought I would take a picture of my shopping cart. Not that you can actually see much.

And then I got home and decided to take pictures of my kitchen shelves:

Two of them, anyway. I promise I have more food. Here’s our breakfast/coffee station:

And really bad picture of a lovely sign:

We made a big pot of rice and veggies for dinner, with some fish fingers. Easy and I could eat it every single day. Then, bed.

Monday: 26.02

I didn’t sleep well so I woke up late on Monday and didn’t do anything of what I intended to do. I worked from 5-7, got home and deep cleaned/de-cluttered the bathroom, while I made dinner. We had leftover rice with sautéed black beans, onions, peppers, green beans, sweet corn, mushrooms, olives and cherry tomatoes. It was yummy and healthy and no-meat which is always a win in my house.

Tuesday: 27.02

Again, I slept nothing.

I woke up way too late and had to take a taxi to work. It was raining so the kids were literally wet and wild. There were so many of them and they were crazy. It was a madhouse and there was nowhere to sit for 3 hours. I forgot we had this dinner with friends and to tell Rui I was off at 8 and not 7. But we made it to dinner on time. We met with his friends at this nice little restaurant and had a great time and a lovely meal. We got home late and I decided “Fuck no, I’m not going to wake up late again” so I didn’t take my sleeping pills. I didn’t sleep at all, obviously, so I spent all night listening to podcasts.

Wednesday – Today: 28.02

I got up at 7 a.m for coffee and breakfast and got ready to go to the pool for some hydro gymnastics class. While having coffee, I realized my pink and white pajamas kind of matched my pink and white mug:

Such is life. I might have issues. Either that or I own too much pink. So yeah, that’s it. I’m currently writing this post before work. It will be pretty crazy again. So excited.

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About my weekend to-do list:

• Deep clean/organized the bathroom; – Done on Monday!
• Deep clean one of our bedroom walls that is getting moldy (there’s this perfect detergent that cleans any trace of mold or humidity marks without any damage to the surface); – Done on Sunday.
• Deep clean/purge our kitchen;
• Laundry, always; – Some, obviously.
• Make a dental appointment; – I did, but then I had to miss it for work.
• Schedule a vet appointment;
• Force Rui to schedule an eye doctor appointment;
• Meal plan and prep for next week; – I have the plan on my head. It counts for something.
• Charge my power bank;
• Work on my freelance project;
• Clean living room;
• Clean bedroom; – Hoping to do this today. I hate cleaning during the week but it really needs to be cleaned and organized.
• Change bed sheets;
• Get two gym bags ready in advance;
• Get my clothes ready for the week;
• Do a little grocery shopping; – Done.
• Do some gardening;
• Watch a movie or two;
• Try making homemade granola/cereal bars;
• Get my eyebrows done;
• Write a few letters;
• Sell a few things online;
• Get something for my dry ends; – Done on Sunday.

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About February:

• Finish my big freelance work project and get maybe one more. Extra income is always welcome.
• Go to the pool 5 times a week. I’m really enjoying it. – No. I’ve been going twice or 3 times, which is weird for someone who has never actually done any regular exercise. I would really love to go every weekday. I love it, I sleep better, my back doesn’t hurt, my day runs smoothly, I’m in a better mood, etc. So many benefits.
• Keep on leaving my nails alone (not biting them) – Done!!!
• Keep on drinking 1.5 l of water every day. – Yes!!
• Blog every single day. – I don’t think so. But I’ve definitely got my groove on. I had lost in somewhere in August and am now getting back to my normal rhythm. 
• Read 3 books. – No, but I’ve been listening to so many podcasts. That counts for something? No?
• Read as many blog posts as I can every day. – Yes. I’ve been better at this.
• See/talk to family and friends as much as possible. – Yes, yes, yes!!
• Keep my de-cluttering/rearranging/reorganizing process. – Going!
• Remember my year 26 challenges. – Yes!

Well, I must confess I did/am doing better than I thought. Not such a bad month after all.

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Random photo dump:

See you, guys!!

Plans and Goals for March

Good afternoon and happy Thursday! I’m sure you’re all happy it’s almost Friday, aren’t you? So am I. I’m kind of tired.

Although I love to make plans and to set goals, I’m not as keen on it as I have been before. Why? Well, only because I don’t want or feel the need to push myself to do too much at this time of my life. I do push myself a little every day, of course. I make sure I drink water, I try to read more, to be organized, to blog and so on, but only because life is so busy and fast-paced these days and we’d never get anything done if we didn’t make sure to make it happen. However, I think I’ve lost the my lifelong tendency to be mean to myself, so I make sure not to push too hard or expect too much, which is huge for the girl who once asked her doctor what’s the absolute minimum you need to sleep to function, so I could fit more into my day.

All of this to say I do make plans and have goals, I just don’t care too much if I don’t accomplish them. I try and like to be productive and crazy busy is my favorite mode, I mean, I’m still the same person, but I understand that’s not always the best for me.

If you are one of those people who like to keep adding to their plate and pushing themselves too hard, I strongly advise you to take a step back and take it slow a little. I’m speaking from experience here, trust me. You could be seriously damaging both your physical and mental health. Be kind to yourself.

• Celebrate our 5th anniversary. We’re planning on maybe taking a little trip to a city I’ve never been to, here in Portugal. We have friends there too so we’re probably going to visit them.
• Plan a little getaway trip.
• Paint our house. We really wanted to have done this last Summer but ended up not doing it. I think we’ll do it this month instead of waiting for the Summer. We really need to paint all of our inside walls and our patio walls too.
• Spend Easter with Rui’s family. Although they’re catholic my family don’t celebrate Easter so we always spend this holiday with Rui’s side of the family, traveling to his hometown and spending the long weekend.
• Get little Easter treats for everyone, on a budget. I hate this time of year because we always spend so much on chocolate. I hate giving presents that people are just going to eat and be done with 😂
• Have my sister over for a few days.
• Watch the Oscars.
• Make sure the kids finish this term with good grades. Please, God! Put some sense into their little heads. They can be so lazy and careless. I try to do my part but I cannot study for them or force them to work.
• Finish my freelance work project until the 15th.
• Blog every day. There are a few things I really want to post this month:

1. Guest Post Sunday
2. Freelance Work and how I make money online
3. How we save money part II
4. Question of the day
5. The loveliest quotes

• Get our garden ready for Spring.
• Lose 10 pounds.
• Go to the pool at least 3x a week.
• Keep on decluttering.

What are your plans for March?

❤️

Bloggers Talk About Mental Health Support Group on Facebook – Will you join us?

Bloggers Talk About Mental Health Support Group

Hello Fellow Bloggers,

I have been talking about my struggles with anxiety, depression and ,possibly, Bipolar Disorder Type II since I started this blog a year ago. I was never ashamed to put it out there. I mean, I’m lying. I was NO LONGER ashamed to put it out there. There was a lot of shame once.

There was also loneliness.

That is why I decided to start this Facebook group where we can all talk, support each other, vent, complain, share experiences and frustrations, all with people who DO understand.

I know many of you struggle with mental health issues as well, so I thought we could all be together in this. Will you be my shoulder to cry on? I will be very happy to be yours.

Look for the group, share with your friends who needed us as well.

Love you all.

Chey.

I have Great News!!

Everyone,

I just wanted to stop by and tell you that I had an appointment with my psychiatrist yesterday and she said I looked like a different person. She said I’m so much better and that she was very happy to see me. She reduced my medication and so I’m no longer on Bupropion and Mexazolam, which I have been taking for the longest time.

I’m just so happy about this.

It’s the first time I’ve seen a real improvement and reduction on my medication, after years of increasing it, changing it, trial and error. I’ve been dealing with anxiety and depression since I was 18. I was diagnosed and first medicated at 22. I’ve been through 2 psychiatrists, 5 therapists and I know 75% of antidepressants, mood stabilizers and anti anxiety pills on the market.

I wish I didn’t have so much information. But since I do, I need to make sure I share it with others. And I promise you I’ll do that. For those of you who are still struggling, I’ll share my detailed experience and do my best to help.

Today, I just want to tell you it’s possible to get better. I’m not cured and I don’t know when/if I’ll ever be, but I’m finally so much better.

Trust me, I have seen the darkest side of life. I’ve felt it. I’ve lived with a huge cloud over my head for years. I’ve been through life carrying a backpack full of rocks for way too long. I’ve hated myself, everyone else, life itself. Everything has seemed pointless. Everyone has looked like an enemy. Death has been a wish.

I know it’s difficult and sometimes unfair/hard to compare, but I can tell you I had one of the most serious and difficult cases of clinical depression. I know quite a few people who have suffered from depression and they all got better so much easily, faster, sooner. That was frustrating and I would get angry because I seemed to have it worse than everyone else. I actually did. Years of extreme stress, heartbreak, responsibilities, growing up too fast, taking care of others, being strong for them, a bad childhood, among other things had collapsed on me, so I was dealing with 20 something years worth of trauma, damage, exhaustion. I wasn’t having an episode of depression. I was having THE episode of depression I had been holding inside me forever. It hit me hard, with no mercy.

God knows how much I’ve been through because of my mental health.

God knows how much Rui has been through because of it.

That guy is a saint.

I don’t say this because I love him, I say this because I know him. He is a rock. He’ll take care of you, provide you with whatever you need, comfort you, be there for you emotionally, know how to handle an anxiety attack, do extensive research on all of your medications, make sure you take care of yourself, cook for you, clean for you, understand when you simply cannot get out of bed, cuddle you, give you hope, say you’re beautiful when you’ve put on 60 pounds, make you laugh when you really want to cry, protect you, tell you you’ll find the best possible doctor and care, no matter how much you’ll have to spend or how you’re going to find the money for, do his best to make you smile, be your shoulder to cry on, defend you, tell people who think “depression is in your head” they’re fucking idiots and ignorants who should go and get some information, be your mother’s best friend, your sister’s big brother, be there for your appointments, get you the things you like because they’ll make you a little happy, get really angry at you because you don’t eat properly, be your absolute best friend, caretaker, boyfriend, husband, lover, confidant, partner, fan, the one who makes up for whatever is missing.

I think everyone should have someone like Rui in their lives.

We’ve been through thick and thin and we’re still together. We’ve really been through some real “grown up” problems for the past 5 years we’ve been together. There was never cheating, jealousy, cellphone checking, lying, issues with exes. We’ve been dealing with real, hard, old married couple problems since we were about 22 and 22, up until now. I guess we’ve passed the test.

What I really want to say is, I’m not cured. I may never be. I don’t mind really, as long as I have the proper care. But today, finally, I can say that I am far BETTER. Better is a beautiful word. So I’m happy about better. Better is more than enough.

Thank you for everything, guys.

If you’re going through a similar journey, we’re together. Talk to me. Let me be there for you.

Daily Planner and Journal – 05.02.2018: Trying to bring it back (about 8 hours late) + weekend

Good afternoon guys,

How are you facing Monday?

It’s a hard one right?

• Hangover from drinking while watching Super Bowl?
• Depressed because of THAT This is Us episode?
• Shocked/ecstatic because Kylie Jenner has given birth?
• All of the above?

Right.

May your coffee be strong and your chocolate be plenty.

I’m actually fine. I don’t care for the Super Bowl, I haven’t watched THAT episode yet (Lord help me) and I’ve been googling “Kylie Jenner pregnant” every day since September, waiting for news so I’m pretty satisfied. I’m not joking about the google part.

I really want to go back to my early morning planning and before bed journaling and update on how my day went and how I tackled my to-do list. I know you guys enjoy it and I feel more organized when I do so.

I would like the planning to be published at about 8 a.m and the update to go up at about 8 p.m. it would be nice to have somewhat of a schedule. I hope I can pull it off.

About the weekend: I did nothing. I was expecting it so I am fine with it. I needed a break. For real.

I have this huge freelance writing project to finish until the end of the week so I’m working on that.

I’m so much better than last week, thankfully.

See you soon, guys.

❤️