When you just don’t feel like blogging…

You know me. As a blogger, I mean. I’ve written every day for the past (almost) 6 months. Most days, I write or publish more than one post. What happens when such an active blogger doesn’t feel like blogging?

  • Take a break, for as long as you need.
  • Never feel guilty for not writing. This is, after all, a hobby. Not your job.
  • Look for a cause. Yes, there’s usually one. Maybe you lack inspiration, maybe you’re feeling lazy or maybe something about the blogging world is bothering you. You need to know why you feel the need to get away from it.
  • Don’t care about numbers. They will obviously go down when you’re not blogging. You can handle that. You can either have a couple of posts prepared for such situations or you can do what I did: re-post old posts. You are getting content out during your break.
  • Don’t answer comments if you don’t want to. Always answer them, your readers deserve that, but it doesn’t have to be an immediate task. They can wait until you’re active again.
  • Along with comments, don’t fell like you NEED to answer emails or social media related anything. You are on a break, you can take advantage of the blogging hiatus and do a social media detox. We need them.
  • Think of your break as a vacation. Don’t brainstorm ideas, don’t think about your blog at all. Once you get back at it, you’ll have plenty of time. And you will miss it, which will help with your blogging tiredness.
  • Don’t pick a date to be back. You shouldn’t feel like you have a deadline, because you don’t. Setting a date can cause stress.
  • Talk with your blogging best friends. Do you have some? It’s amazing to have a small group of blogger best friends to guide and give advice to each other. I have a group of girls that I trust, adore and talk openly outside of the blogging world. If you don’t have such “squad” I can teach you how to get one, by meeting people, interacting with them in different ways and develop a real friendship.
  • If you don’t feel like it, don’t even read blogs. Just say away from the whole thing. If you have a strong and supportive community they will understand.

What really happened in my case: I was busy and had a lot of my plate but, mostly, I was tired of blogging. For several reasons, I just didn’t want to do it. It was that simple. I didn’t want to write. So I didn’t. I just gave myself time, haven’t been active for over a week, just publishing old posts from my earlier months. I haven’t been answering comments or even reading all of the blogs I follow. I’ve been only posting on Instagram, because it’s easy and doesn’t require any writing (besides a small description).

We all feel the need to be consistent with our blogs and we all feel guilty when we aren’t. We even apologize, sometimes. But we shouldn’t. This is informal blogging, you owe nothing to anyone. You’re free to work on your blog whenever you feel like it. it’s your space, and you must enjoy it.

Has this ever happen to you? Just simply being tired of blogging?

I would love to read your stories/opinion.

Thank you so much for reading. I’ve missed you.

Love, Chey.

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Let’s talk…

First of all, I would like to thank everyone who has left sweet comments on every single post, despite my long absence and general neglect. Thank you so much for keeping up with me and I promise I won’t ever leave you for good. I just need my breaks sometimes.

I’ll need more breaks in the future, I’m sure of that. Things are not always easy, especially for someone who has to live with mental illness. Blogging (among other things) has been giving me anxiety lately, so I’ve been doing what feels right for me and staying away from it. I’ve told you this before so, no news there.

I’ve been dealing with anxiety over a few other things too. The fact that I depend on some people right now, makes me feel like I’m really failing at life and ruining theirs. If it weren’t for me, some people would be better. I’m not saying this in a suicidal thinking way. Not at all. I’m being literal. If I didn’t have this problem, my family and friends would be better off. It’s very hard to deal with someone who is really sick, because that’s what I am. For those who don’t believe in mental illness or don’t feel like it should be considered as such, I’m sorry but you are ignorant, misinformed and you should be ashamed of yourself. I recommend some reading on the subject, for those who might care. For those you don’t care about being ignorant and discriminating people who suffer from mental illness, well, all advice I can give is “Go fuck yourself and I hope you or a family member never have to deal with such health issues”.

Because I know the majority of my readers are not like that at all, I apologize for my words, but I needed to get them off my chest. Because I know you care, I’ll continue to explain what’s been happening to me.

Firstly, there’s the physical issues that come with mental illness and that I obviously endure from time to time. I understand them and I’ve learned to accept them, but they get in the way. Imagine what is like when you can’t work, so you can’t help financially and you can’t take care of what you’re supposed to do around the house, because you feel pain (yes, depression gives you general body pain) and exhaustion like you’ve never felt before. This is when people generally think their friend or loved one is lazy or is trying to get rid of laundry. Sometimes that can be true, but if they really suffer from depression, they’re most likely not faking it. So, you can’t pay for things and you can’t do the majority of the work around the house. You begin to feel useless. That’s the first feeling that overcomes you and me.

I’ve been trying to be positive and I think I’m becoming better at that. But there’s always a little voice bugging me and telling me what a burden I am. It hurts to think of yourself like that. But you can’t let it define you. People have needed you and they might need you again in the future. Now it’s just your turn to be taken care of. That’s what we need to keep in mind.

And now, I’ll tell you how I’ve been dealing with these difficult stage:

  • I’m trying to find a small way to contribute financially. I’m waiting for an answer on that job proposal, which my psychiatrist approves because it’s only 13 hours a week. And I’m signing up for online freelance work. (Nothing to do with the blog). I’m currently negotiating with two people from two different projects that I can easily work on at home.
  • When it comes to housework, I try the “bit by bit + sit method”, which I’ve just made up. I unload the dishwasher and feel exhausted, so I sit down. When I feel better, I hang the laundry, and then I sit down. I clean the bathroom and take a cat nap. That’s how I have (not) been managing. It’s as much as I can do right now. I’m really sorry about that but the strength is not in me. I wish it could be like a Sims game, where you can see your Sim’s energy level. Then people would be able to see how bad I actually feel and understand.
  • If I don’t feel like doing something, I just don’t. (That’s what’s been happening with blogging). This might be controversial, because doctors say you shouldn’t be in bed, depressed, all they long, but I disagree. You can spend your day in bed as long as:

 

  1. It’s not every day; You can take one day or two if you’re feeling really bad, but not a week.
  2. You get up, get cleaned up and out of pajamas (wear something comfy but not pajamas), eat well, and make your bed. This way it doesn’t seem like you never got out of bed, it seems like you’re just chilling in bed, doing something.
  3. Do something that you either love or that is useful. Read, watch movies, documentaries (my thing lately), educational videos, crochet, color or listen to music. You can even blog, just don’t caught up and spend the whole day pasturing around social media or Buzzfeed.
  4. Get up from time to time and do something small.
  5. Just because you’re having a rest day, it doesn’t mean you can eat bad food. No. You’re allowed to rest, not to indulge.
  6. Let people know you are in one of those days. If they don’t understand, that’s their problem. But you should be able to say to a family member or friend that you are having a really bad day, maybe you’re too tired or in pain.

 

Keep in mind that tomorrow will be a new day. It always is. No matter how bad today was, you have a new chance to start over every single day. How lucky are we to have that option? Just take every day as you go, according to your energy levels and mental ability. That’s the best (and maybe only) thing you can do right now, which is taking good care of yourself.

On another note, I’ve been doing something that I think is helping. When I go to bed, I use spotify on my phone (with earplugs and in the dark) to listen to relaxing soft jazz music, relaxing piano tunes, white noise (for me heavy rain or a fireplace cracking are the ones that work best), or guided meditation. I have to admit I’m not a big fan of the latter. The talking distracts me. I focus way better with soft music. I eventually feel very sleepy and relaxed and I put the phone down and sleep.

I really hope that this post is good enough to tell you how I’ve been feeling and to explain my absence, but that it is also helpful and that my experience and tips might help your or someone you know, in the same situation.

Please tell me if you like this post and if you would like to read more about this topic. How I deal with my down moments and symptoms, and how I cope in general. If it’s boring and depressing, just be honest, we’re friends.

Thank you so much for reading.

Cheila.

P.S. Don’t worry, the lists, and fun random posts and videos will come back as soon as I’m well enough to make them ❤

Pocket full of random #5 – I’m not back, repeat, I’m not back!!

Hello everyone,

I’m not blogging. Well, technically I am, but I’m not back!

I’ll only be back when I’m:

  1. Up to date with your blog posts.
  2. All of my old comments answered.
  3. A few posts organized.

I want my “blogging life” to be organized and stress free, so I’m not posting for a few days after this update post.

What else?

Oh, this one is going to be bad.

I sadly declare that will not continue to read the Harry Potter series. I was taking to long to read the second one, not liking it and forcing myself to do it just because everyone seems to love it and were expecting my reaction. That was causing some stress, as I wanted to read it to please everyone and was not reading other books I am actually interested in. I’m sorry. It’s just not for me. You probably read this at 11. I’m doing it at 25 and I just can’t get into it. I’ll guess I’ll stay out of the loop.

Anyway,

I’m fine and calm and wearing my phone on my sports bra that I wear at home (not always the same one, I have several lol) to count my steps, which is really nice because I challenge myself to take as many as I can.

I’m being good when it comes to my health and diet.

I’ve been sleeping very, very well.

Please don’t find it strange if I’m answering your comments from a month ago.

Love you and miss you.

C.