Me: So, do you read?
Student: I do, I read a lot.
Me: That’s really great.
Student: Yeah, on Twitter. Some really big texts sometimes.
Student 1: Logan Paul showed this picture of a man who had killed himself on YouTube and now he’s in trouble.
Me: That was a very bad thing to do.
Student 2: Why? the guy was already dead.
Student 1: Duh… Someone might think he had killed the guy himself.
Me: Eating sugar is really bad for you.
Student: I don’t eat sugar.
Me: Of course you do.
Student: I don’t eat sugar packs.
Me: I know. But there’s sugar in food.
Me: Do you eat cereal?
Me: Well, what do you eat?
Student: Teacher, I asked x to kiss me and he kissed me on the cheek.
Student: Then I asked him to kiss me somewhere else and he kissed my other cheek.
Old lady in the locker room, talking to another old lady:
– Well, at least you can still get dressed while standing up.
– That’s because I can’t bend my knee.