Normal is happy

Good evening my dear friends,

I write to you being already on my pajamas, sitting on my living room rug, near my space heater. It feels comfortable. Getting home, getting rid of all accessories, clothes, makeup, put your hair up in a ponytail and just relax.

I’m so glad I’m back to work and back to my normal routine. Normal, sometimes boring feels amazing right now. I have been in such a state of depression for the past few weeks that I was unable to work for the longest time. I’m out of bed now and finally doing what I always do, what I’ve always done – work. Normal is happy, right now.

I’m back to being a teacher, being with people, making money (which was starting to become a problem as I was not making any for more than a month. Mr.R earns a very good salary but we have a lot of expenses, besides my medical expenses). I was feeling really bad because I was not contributing while being the “biggest expense”. All is well now. I can finally breathe and not feel like a burden. All of this to say that I feel much better. I have energy, I have willpower, I have strength. Maybe the treatment is finally working, I don’t know. But I take whatever it is.

I woke up at 6 a.m, ate breakfast (two pieces of toast and some coffee with milk), let the dog out, fed the dog, did my yoga workout, picked up the dry clothes from the line and put another load to dry, divided last nights leftovers into Tupperware containers for this week’s lunches and dinners, made my bed, took a shower, got dressed, did my makeup and was ready to leave. While leaving I accidentally left the gate open and Rosa ran away again, Rui had to chase her throughout the whole neighborhood and finally bring her home so we could leave.

I got to the office at almost ten, taught a 90 minute class (preparing someone for a job interview) and then was free until four. I read many blogs, wrote two posts and ate lunch. I studied Italian for about two hours until my next student came at four. Then I worked for three hours and came home. It was a calm day. A normal day.

And now I’m here, feeling happy simply because I lived today. It is just a normal Monday, but it means so much more. Maybe I would not be here if it wasn’t for you guys. You give me strength and confidence and motivation. This blog and my readers have given me so much. You could never know how important you are and how I really love you and wish the best the world has to give for each one of you. Thank you for being there, in the good moments and in the bad moments.

Sorry about the boring, maybe too sentimental post. You know I write what I feel. Today you get happy and grateful.

Love you, my people!

xo